i once had an interview…

 

lexi blog

How long have you been coaching?

Professionally, just under 18 months.

How do you define ‘success’?

There is an approximate of 7.2 billion people on this beautiful planet, and I can confidently say, there are 7.2 billion definitions of success. I believe I have defined success (for me), although it simultaneously changes and evolves, as I grow as human being.

I remember thinking that success was having a good job with high responsibility, a 6-figure wage, a nice car, and nice home and a good-looking boyfriend. And unless I had ALL of these, I wasn’t successful. So I spent a lot of my time feeling relatively unsuccessful as I continuously compared myself with others who had these‘things’ and with that ‘person’ I thought I had to be.

It was through my own experience, and awakening, that I came to realize that success doesn’t exist in the form, but rather experienced through the formless. Meaning, even if I DID have all those things (form) I thought I needed, I wouldn’t have ever felt that feeling (formless) of success that I was searching for. Success is an inside job.

Success is not in the ‘doing’ of anything, but rather in the ‘how’ it’s being done. As long as I have happiness in that very moment (or at least acceptance!), it doesn’t matter what I’m doing. When I made this conscious shift, and began to align my inner world with my outer world, the opportunity, money, people and things that I was striving for previously and never seemed to reach, seemed to flow into my world effortlessly and abundantly.

Success isn’t determined by what you have or what you do, but rather how you do it. Society may claim the man sweeping the streets is unsuccessful, but if this man loves what he does, and brings love and laughter to it, this man is more successful then the rich banker on antidepressants who suffers anxiety in his million dollar home.

I remember hearing stories like this before in my ‘previous life’… Part of me wanted to believe this blissful visual, but at that point in my life part of me didn’t believe it was possible. Until I discovered it for myself, and experienced the complete bliss and peacefulness that now fills me from head to toe, every day.

It was through this realization; that I decided it was my mission to share my learnings and experience with others, so they too could have this blissful happiness in every moment, and realise that ‘thing’ they spend their entire life searching for, is right under their nose… literally.

What do you believe about coaching?

Coaching is like a ‘friendly reminder’. There is nothing that I know, that my clients don’t already know, I just remind them.

An objective view on certain circumstances, along with the sharing of wisdom and knowledge, and to be pushed out of a comfort zone, is crucial and imperative for growth.

I don’t believe people ‘need’ coaching, some people are happy with average lives, drifting with the flow of life. However if an extraordinary, fruitful, passionate and abundant life is what is desired, coaches bring the tools, wisdom, steps and knowledge and in most cases, the experience, to make this happen.

I’m eternally grateful for the ‘friendly reminders’, sharing’s and gentle pushes I’ve received from my coaches. I wouldn’t be where I am today without their guidance, love and knowledge.

What do you believe about change?

It’s inevitable! Everything is changing, all the time. If it’s not changing, it’s dead.

The key with change is how you choose to handle it, how you choose to ‘react’ to it. Change cannot be controlled, it happens weather we like it or not. What we CAN control, is our reaction to it, the meaning we give it, and how we feel about it.

What do you believe about time?

Time is a social and mental construct. There is only now.

For me, time is forever unfolding moments of now.

The past is memory, which exists only in our head. The future is anticipation or created visuals, which also exists only in our head. There is only now!

Unless time (and the mind!!) is understood, humans will constantly live in fear of it. The past is carried around on shoulders all over the world: “Because this happened to me in the past; this means I can’t do this.” Or “I will have pain for the rest of my life because ‘so-and-so’ did this to me” … The only place it exists is in our minds and in the stories we create.

At any moment, every man, woman and child has a choice. The only person bringing that pain of the past or the fear of the future into your life; is you. Awakening is the realization of presence, the now.

What do you believe about money?

Money is energy, the same as humans are energy. I believe you attract money, the same way you attract humans and I believe you have a relationship with money the same way you have with humans.

If you treat another human badly, that human isn’t going to want to come and see you, it may even speak badly of you to others. I see the relationship with money the same. If I abuse, misuse, or condemn money, why would it want to come to me? Why would my mind provide for me the opportunities to receive money when I talk badly of it or abuse it? The mind will only give you what you really want, so if I have negative energy or thoughts around money, it will not flow to me.

When you align your inner world with your outer world, you create balance. When this balance is created, the abundant love and energy flows to you and through you. When I stopped searching for money, money came to me. When I stopped giving with the expectation of receiving (anything!), I received more then I could ever have wished for.

What do you value?

I value love, growth, adventure, creativity and contribution

What are your rules around these values?

I am love and love is everything – so there are no rules there.

Growth – I choose to grow from every moment. Each moment contains a lesson and a positive learning. If you don’t grow, you die. I also see and feel with the more growth and education I have; the more I can share and serve others.

Adventure – Everyday is an adventure for me! Although I set myself tasks and to-do’s for my days ahead, I am flexible for whatever else comes my way, and because of this, every day is different, new and unexpected. I push myself often to get out of my comfort zone; an adventure outside the realm of certainty and into the realm of uncertainty!

Creativity – All geniuses and entrepreneurs are creative. They see things different to others, step outside the realm of certainty, outside of what’s comfortable and look at things from a completely different perspective. I admire creative thinkers, and aspire to be more of one. To strengthen my creative thinking, I embrace my creativity through different forms of expression.

Art has no boundaries. You can paint outside the lines, you can color-in trees whatever color you wish, you can distort images. It is a completely blank canvas to which you can put ANYTHING you dream onto it. This is how I see life. Each moment, you are presented with a blank canvas, and in this moment, you can paint what ever you choose on it….

Embracing creative expression through art and music has strengthened my ability to be a creative business thinker. The more creativity I use and express, the more creative, exciting and colorful my life and I become.

Contribution – Contributing to other peoples lives and to this earth is my deepest desire. Everybody has the ability to give and to serve, even if it’s just a smile. I ensure that each time I connect with a person, I want them feeling better than what they were when they saw me. And each place I go to, I leave in a better condition then when I arrived. I pick up rubbish when I walk past it, I don’t leave it on the floor for someone else, I smile at strangers, talk to cashiers, and give love and gratitude to everyone.

I am constantly reminded how beautiful and important contribution is, especially during my workshops. I see people walk through the door, confused, lost, depressed, close to giving up, and I see them leave glowing from the inside out, empowered, inspired, courageous and strong. There is no better feeling in this world, then giving and sharing from the heart and watching those around you blossom as a result.

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